CC05 Conversation Hour 03 - 21st Century Relationships - Terry Real, LICSW

Description:

Educational Objectives:

1. To learn the philosophies of various practitioners and theorists.

*Sessions may be edited for content and to preserve confidentiality*

Outline:

Working with Individuals on the Autism Spectrum

• Challenges arise in building empathy and relational awareness in individuals with PDD-NOS and Asperger’s.

• One case involved empowering a wife to move for the son’s specialized education, while the empathic but emotionally distant father stayed behind.

• Teaching relational skills to someone with Asperger’s can feel harsh but may later be appreciated; clarity and realism are key.

Setting Expectations with Psychiatric Disorders

• When working with individuals with ADD or Asperger’s, it's crucial to assess what is realistically achievable.

• Medication can affect behavior and social functioning; tailor expectations accordingly.

• Understand limitations and establish firm but appropriate boundaries.

Women’s Shifting Roles in the 21st Century

• Women move between quadrants defined by self-esteem and boundaries.

• Traditional roles placed women “one-down and bound”; liberation can push them “one-up and angry.”

• Many women swing between submission and assertion, shaped by evolving cultural dynamics.

Men’s Roles and Power Dynamics

• Questions about male use of authority and police involvement reflect deeper relational dynamics.

• Therapists must teach clients to distinguish between external roles (power position) and internal reality (emotional state).

• Healthy hierarchy is needed in therapy and relationships; boundaries matter more than power.

Integrating Therapeutic Approaches

• A therapist’s background may blend psychodynamic, strategic family therapy, trauma-informed care, and gender theory.

• Understanding a client’s full context and history is essential to integrate effective treatment methods.

Relationship Empowerment and Non-Violence

• Empowerment means living non-violently—with others and oneself.

• Avoid psychological violence like contempt, grandiosity, or retaliation.

• Even victims can act out harmfully; understanding this cycle is critical.

Progress and Resistance Among Men

• Some men have embraced relational growth, but patriarchal norms still shape many male behaviors.

• Empowered women may trigger defensiveness or grandiosity in younger men.

• Acknowledging both progress and resistance helps navigate gendered dynamics.

Empowerment for Women

• Women often oscillate between compliance and indignation; true empowerment blends truth and love.

• The goal is clear, assertive, compassionate communication—vital for healthy relationships.

Complex Relationship Dilemmas

• A couple facing a lesbian affair chose celibacy; therapy focused on redefining connection.

• Relationships without sex can still thrive with acceptance and mutual value.

• Avoid victimhood by making conscious, worthwhile choices and appreciating what’s present.