All couples and couples therapies struggle with issues of mixed loyalties. At any given moment, do I choose my own fulfillment as an individual or do I yield to the needs of the relationship? Is it a zero-sum game in which one partner wins and one loses – and if not, how else can we think about it? This keynote address introduces a model integrating both attachment and differentiation in couples therapy through the idea of enlightened self-interest – taking care of yourself by taking care of the relationship – as well as a model of healthy sacrifice, which is missing in our contemporary, Narcissistic culture.
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Research confirms our clinical experience. We can teach partners all manner of skills but in moments of triggering, emotional flooding, skills go out the window. Why? Because we are no longer in our adult selves. Our thinking brain has shut down and the limbic system has taken over. An inner child part has seized the wheel. This workshop introduces a model of working with the traumatized parts of the partners we treat by empowering individuals to come into conscious relationship with those parts—loving, understanding, and ultimately containing them.
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$29.00Base Price - $59.00 Sale is $29.00price reduced from Base Price - $59.00
Biological anthropologist Helen Fisher discusses three brain systems that evolved for mating and reproduction: the sex drive; feelings of intense romantic love; and feelings of deep attachment to a long term partner. She then focuses on her brain scanning research (using fMRI) on romantic rejection and the trajectory of love addiction following rejection. She concludes with discussion of the brain circuits associated with long-term partnership happiness and the future of relationships in the digital age—what she calls “slow love.”
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$29.00Base Price - $59.00 Sale is $29.00price reduced from Base Price - $59.00
This one-hour presentation will demonstrate cross-dialogic and other strategic techniques for shepherding couples toward secure functioning, an attitudinal and behavioral expectation that couples operate as a two-person psychological system. Because the concept of secure-functioning is principle based and not personality based, the success of secure-functioning relationships does not depend upon attachment orientation. The presentation will endeavor to help the clinician utilize psychobiological strategies to help clarify partner attachment strategies, true desires, and unspoken agendas in couple therapy.
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$29.00Base Price - $59.00 Sale is $29.00price reduced from Base Price - $59.00
The psychobiologically oriented couple therapist understands that the intersubjective, phenomenological process operating in primary attachment relationships relies heavily on fast acting implicit memory systems. Because of this phenomenon partners in a relationship rarely know what they are doing or why, and so they confabulate meaning in the absence of real understanding. Additionally, partners in couple therapy maintain hidden agendas and use deception in order to protect themselves from loss.
Price:
$29.00Base Price - $59.00 Sale is $29.00price reduced from Base Price - $59.00